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by Moniker

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An album about shiny things

[This is a reconfigured tracklist of the original album with several songs relegated to bonus tracks to weed out some songs that I feel don't fit the album as well, and to (hopefully) give the album a better flow. Because I can. Yay bandcamp.

The original full, possibly unwieldy album is stlll available on cd and Spotify. While this version makes for a better album, the 14-song one is probably more reflective of its creator's sporadic compositional style at the time.]

All tracks written & produced by Jordan Abell
With the exceptions of:
"An American Girl", written by Jordan Abell and Jeremy Burke
"Anna", which is an interpolation of "Donna" by Ritchie Valens (©Del-Fi Records)
and "Credit Card", produced by Dan Petrino

A huge thank you to everyone who helped make this album happen, all family and friends who played, sang, or made any sort of sound or art

And a special thank you to Jeremy Burke, without whom this would probably not be a real thing that exists


released September 17, 2013




Moniker Virginia

I'm Jordan, and here is some music I wrote

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Track Name: Virginia, Land of Virgins
Spin my globe and put my finger on it
at the end of every night

What's it gonna be, la France or l'Italia

Living in my head, conversations with the dead
Where are all the living legends

I could start something new with the pieces that I choose
but there's always so much to lose

But I know that once I go there
I'll have nowhere to dream about
It's all too perfect
So is it worth it
Do the best things always let you down

I could go through hell, as long as I learn
how to sell and always have a good story to tell

Tell me, there's got to be somebody out there
Who can airbrush the stills and verify my lines
A perfect stranger
Without any danger
I'd skydive, but I'm terrified

Thinking of a masterplan,
for the sweat from my hands to make mansions on the sand
Wouldn't you be jealous of that man

I think about it all day long
Even if I don't know what it's made of, I just know it's what I want

Cause alchemists don't know the chemistry of gold
I'm tired of searching through my sould
La da da da da
da da da da da da
Turn it around
The new world is old

Spin my globe and put my finger on it
Spin my globe can't put my finger on it
Track Name: Two Halves of a Whole
Is this what you want
Then take it, take him away
He’s your ragdoll
Bend him and shake him, control him and break him
You’re a sick little fuck
You can’t help it, you’ve got to grow up
You always get what you want

I’m inside your head
But I don’t care anymore
All my friends
Have just grown bored
I don’t care anymore
I don’t care anymore
I’m going away now
And I’m leaving in the morning

What’s the matter, man
Did I ever do any thing to you
Open up your mouth
I’d really like to know what you’re thinking
Or would nothing come out?

Just be yourself
Cause you can’t be anyone else

I think I’ve had enough
There’s nothing good to be done around you
I’m heading out
I’m not looking back and you’re not looking up

I’m inside your head
But I don’t care anymore
All your words
Still sting like open sores
I don’t care anymore
I don’t care anymore
I’m going away now
And I’m leaving in the morning
Track Name: An American Girl
Beginning of suite about growing out of a horrible type of phase in yr adolescent life


Here on the dance floor,
The only place where I can’t dance;
Watching an american girl—
Head hanging down,
Hands toward the ground—
I’m out of it, I’m out of it, I’m out of it.

I planned and I tried to perfect my night,
I should have just let it go
You know,
Sometimes you just can’t take things slow
I wanna try, I wanna dance
Wanna have fun but I can’t
Something’s stopping me
In this chinese finger-trap party

It’s just a good time, I know, I know
That’s not the problem with me
I’m in love with an american girl
An american girl
An american girl
With a smile like a wolf
Who seems to be
Better at life than me

I always thought that you would stay home
And I’d always know where I could find you
Then I saw you leaving in your car
And I chased after it like a dog
When I finally caught you
I didn’t know what to do

I thought you were someone else
Sometimes I still do
Now you’re an american girl
An american girl
An american girl
With a smile like a wolf
Who seems to be
Better at life than me

She’s the smartest & the prettiest &
Most worthless girl I’ve ever seen
And I knew it from the start
What a work of art
I wanted to be Mozart and Casanova too
But I couldn’t be either around you
You’re an american girl
An american girl
An american girl
With a smile like a wolf
Who seems to be
Better at life than me
Track Name: NY Girl
[After considered thought I have decided that might singing on this track is objectively Not Very Good. But I hope you can still enjoy other parts.]

Somehow, ran into a NY Girl
(I'm going downtown if yr coming)
I studied her face all night in neon lights
(I'm going home now if yr coming)

She said she knew a guy 4 or 5 times
(I'm going downtown if yr coming)
All night, different lights, different fights
(I'm going home now if yr coming)

I was in love
til I saw her eyes

In her mirror I saw
that they were just like mine

I said I don't
have anything to add

She said then I guess you
had better call a cab

Cause you've botched the debauchery
Mired in monogamy
Said this NY Girl to me
You don't get me

A few years down the line you'll see
I'd say that NY Girl meant nothing to me
Well I'm back in Virginia I guess it don't mean a thing
Til my eyes go from a bottle to a hand to a ring

You've botched the debauchery
Mired in Monogamy
Said this NY Girl to me
You don't get me

You've botched the debauchery
Mired in monogamy
And you don't seem so lucky

Said this NY Girl to me
Track Name: what girls (legless bird)
Marie would you answer
If I sang to you outside your door
I have no feelings for you but I
I can't take it anymore

I can't stand sleeping alone
But I've still never been on a date
Every night out, there's never been
A single lovely minute to waste

Mia would it change your mind
If I had two tickets to Spain
When I knew you, you'd never want to
Miss a perfect date

I could keep the party going
Long enough for you to stick around
Just one night in your own spotlight
We can go rolling around downtown

Melanie if I drove all night
To see you would I get a smile
We never had much to talk about but I
I don't really mind waiting a while

I'll wait a while
I'll wait a while
I can wait a while
I can wait a while now
Track Name: Anna
I loved a girl, Anna was her name
Or maybe Marianne, some days it's all the same
But I love that girl
Oh my love, where can you be?
Track Name: Marianne + Ferdinand—>la mer
Every night, Anna & I
Would dress up and die
Just to wake up and do it one more time
Until she came alive in my eyes

Martinis in hand
Driving on the sand
Be my snapshot woman
And I'll be your dangerous man

Anything you want, I'll loan
Just don't leave me alone
This drive takes my breath away
But I'm not watching the stars tonight on my own

No no no
Tell me, if I put you on a pedestal
Could you keep your heart from turning to stone?

When we hit the ocean—
When we hit the ocean—
When we hit the ocean—

I thought playing with fire
Would have gotten me higher
I guess I should have been a little lighter

At the end, if I had a change of heart
Would I still be playing the same part?
Well at least I'm not back at the start

And I think of you all the time
But at best, I confess,
It's just a mess of lines

You know
All I wanted to do was
Run with you, run with you, run with you

End suite about growing out of a horrible phase of yr adolescent life
Track Name: Old World Waltz
Everything is across the sea
Or we'd wish it to be
I just want it different for me

A cafe coming out
Of the ruins where I found
You waiting around for me

It was 4.50 for a drink
With a cup built for your pinky
On a plate with Madonna's face

A view where I had expected to cry
But I was just another guy

We went to a club that night
And I got into a fight
But it was only for me

We kissed all the way on the plane
But when the morning came
I was tired

I gave you flowers while steering the boat
They weren't fake but they still broke
We've been taking on water

And when we get back home
We'll keep each other from being alone
(We'll be OK)
Track Name: C'est formidable
I see hometown heroes and foreign lights
I see country days and city nights
I saw everything I wanted tonight
C'est formidable

How one gets it, gets it to stay
And how to stay cool 3,000 miles away
And keep yourself made of clay
C'est formidable

What could you say to calm me down
You take away my drink but you know I'm not so loud
All these sights, all these sounds

I read a dusty book detailing it all
How the young rise up while the old legends fall
I just wanted something to call my own
Track Name: Credit Card (extra)
Mom, Dad, I still have your credit card
I'll give it back once I become independent—
Oh and I still need to fill up my car
For my date tonight, can we add it to her present?

Please please send me across the sea, everyone's making fun of me
I can see it on their faces
Don't be cold, send me on a bed through the sky, up to where I can buy
Those European graces

(no, I got it—it's fine. it's just money, it's not everything)

What can I say, this is the way it has to be—with you supporting me
Every business starts with investors
Don't worry I'll be worth everything, Wunderkind of the New York scene
As soon as I find the right editor
Track Name: In the Afternoon (extra)
He doesn’t need you to tell him who to be
But nothing’s going right, as you can see
He could hide his face from everyone
And never come out, never seem done

He missed his boat, he missed his scene
He slept through everything
Someday he’ll grab the shirtsleeves of the nation
But first he needs a vacation from this vacation, saying

“It’s getting heavy, cause I feel heavy
Can’t move myself to move
I try all the time, trying to define,
Exactly what there is to prove”

He says, “I want people surrounding me
And I also want my privacy”
He just doesn’t want to be bored,
Something to do makes him self-assured.

Sure, he could go, and maybe win
A circle of life, where you’re always in
But if he tried and fell flat
Well where do you go after that?

He just can’t start until he hears “you’re doing fine”
A few words from one farther along the line,
Saying “You’re exhibiting all of the right signs,
I’ll see you in the limelight”

He says “I can’t work with all this noise
With all this silence, you lose your poise”
He’ll try to work to the next bar
Or he’ll take the handle on the case of his guitar.

“Someone once told me working is success
And someone once told me it’s all in your dress
I should decide what’s best for me
I’ll get to it eventually”
Track Name: The Ending (extra)
Now that we've reached the end
Where do we go my friend?
I'll take your hand and you take mine
No such thing as the end of the line

People say life's about the road you go on
But what happens when the curtain falls down?
I was waiting for it all to resolve
You can't just keep on driving around
When you reach the end tie a knot and hold on
And dangling, all the moments past—a flash
A cliffhanger until a perfect denouement
Ending with an immaculate splash

When the credits rolled
I felt so out of control
All together but where to go